Too Young To Be A Mum

I’m a young mum. 23 this year although only 21 when I had my little bundle of joy. But no, this does not mean I was accidentally knocked up, that my life has been ruined, and it most certainly does NOT mean I’m not a good mum! I like to think that I’m a great mum (yes I have days where I doubt myself but my little girl is very happy and I think that is saying something) I hate stereotypes, like really really hate them, especially since becoming a mum. Every time I go to the shops, without fail, I get ‘those’ looks. People judge me without knowing a single thing about me apart from the fact that I have a baby and I look young (unfortunately for me I look even younger than I am).

I’ll admit to being one of those people who judge sometimes as well. I hate that I do but I do. Just the other day I was at Aldi (oh Aldi, I am a true lover of Aldi!) and a man in front of me was dressed like a total dag. Dirty, grey, baggy, tracky daks and an old shirt. Given the shopping centre I was at, I immediately assumed all these things of him and later I was proven very wrong… as we walked out to our cars, he gets into his fancy, shmancy car with all the bells and whistles and drives off. At first I was surprised until I thought about it and figured he was most likely just hanging around at home in his comfy clothing, noticed he needed some milk and eggs and simply didn’t care to change his clothes for a quick trip (I know I have done the same on many occasions). I guess I just imagined rich people hanging around their houses in nice suits, pretty dresses, diamonds and pearls but alas, this must not be true!

Even though I get the disapproving looks (mainly from older women, who might I add, most likely were around my age when they had kids, given what the average age was back 30 or more years ago), I love the little smile and head nod some mothers give to each other while out and about. It’s a “We’re the same, I know what you’re going through, good on you” smile. Even though we know nothing about each other, apart from the fact we carry around little munchkins, often we’re tired and have bits of food/vomit on our clothing, we know that the other person is doing the best they can, they’re experiencing the most wonderful gift life gives us and it’s the best.

Let’s all just chill out, quit jumping to conclusions and judging each other. We’ve all got our own story to tell, and it’s most likely not the story you think it is. When you see the young mum, carrying around her baby or toddler, remember that she was pregnant for 9 months, gave BIRTH to that child, has had many sleepless nights since, is probably running on coffee and toast, and most likely no longer has a perfectly clean home but she is the only one who can love that child like only a mother can. She is a mum, it doesn’t matter how old she is, or if this child was planned, she’s doing her best. Smile at her, it might just make her day.

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8 thoughts on “Too Young To Be A Mum

  1. I LOVE this!! I was 23 when I had my daughter, now at 26 with two toddlers under foot I often get mistaken for the nanny! 🙂 I was actually TRYING to get pregnant, wanting to be a young, energetic mom. It can be so hard at times, especially when the majority of my mom friends are now all at least 10 years older than me, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world!!

    • I love that you were trying and wanted to be a young mum!! I absolutely LOVE that fact that I am and honestly feel that it was the way we were meant to do it! Glad we were surprised with our little monkey. Makes sense when you look at it ‘scientifically/biologically’ 🙂

  2. So true, people are so quick to judge without knowing more. My sis always wanted to be a mum & was collecting baby clothes for years. She was 22 with her first & 41 with her last. I was 29… But wanted to start earlier. Great post.

    • Yeah… to this day I am still guilty of seeing girls who look under 18 with children and being quick to judge as society has put all of these ‘ideals’ into our heads and when something doesn’t fit, we think it isn’t right. But like I said, we never know the persons story. It would be interesting to be able to know sometimes… I think we would find ourselves shocked 😉 thanks for stopping by!

  3. I absolutely love this post, and needed to read this today (hard day). I also had my son when I was 21 so I can completely relate to the stares and judgments people pass on a daily basis. Some were even my own family! My sons father was not involved so when I would go out places with my son it was usually my mom who acted as “father.” People always believed she was the mom of my son and I was his sister! I have learned to just let most of it breeze off my shoulder rather than feeling sad about it, but it is so hard.

    • Thanks 🙂 that means a lot! Love to hear that at least one person got something out of my blogging. I had the same thing many times with people thinking my mum was my babies mother… Made me feel weird. My mum works part time so she spends a lot of time with bubba and I 🙂 it can be so hard some days but like you I have learnt to let it go because it really doesn’t matter in the end what others think 🙂

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